Why do people like to self-inflict pain?? Seriously, I give up. I rest my case. I'll probably distance myself for a while from a friend who doesn't want to listen to me. I don't get it, why ask for my advice when you don't even have the slightest bit of effort to follow it?? Please enlighten me.
I will not tell you what you want to hear. I will tell you what you NEED to know. Infatuation is usually mistaken as love and I have always thought that one won't know the difference between the two unless you experience both. There is a thin line between being optimistic and delusional.
For me, lasting relationships are built on love. I am no love expert but if you want your relationship to work, make sure that you know what is reality and what isn't.
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Image Credits to followandreblog
22 Comments:
this phrase is so so true!
thank you so much for your lovely & comment - & letting me discover you too!
I think we Pinoys watch so much telenovelas that we want the drama too in our lives.
PINKBOW.
Same here.Ü I'll definitely be back to visit your blog.
RICO.
It's not just the local telenovelas, Rico. You can include foreign series too because I noticed that most of the time they don't have happy moments, they always have problems and love problems ─ that's why I'm happy watching 24.
You want enlightenment, Russ?
That has always been my role. The big "ate" who gives advice. And I tell you, talagang nakakapagod. Some people are just so into hurting and inflicting pain on themselves. Parang they are so into injecting more dose of drama into their lives. As what Rico said on his comment, maybe it's our fondness for telenovelas, some wanted to make their lives sappier.
I even had an experience (most of my friends are younger than me, about 8-9 years my junior -- when they were in HS and I'm already working) na one of my friends cut her wrists over some guy. So when I came to the rescue, I was the one who wrapped the wound in a thick towel before rushing her to the hospital. Talagang galit na galit ako. Akala ko she already learned her lesson. A few years after, on my birthday, I didn't realize na magpupunta yung guy and the girl sa party ko (hindi naman together). The girl had too much to drink, created a scene (saying she got pregnant and that guy forced an abortion), and puked her guts out. As in...on my birthday. Naglilinis ako at yung ibang guy friends ko ng kalat niya sa bahay namin. I got fed up. I said I had enough. I mean, same guy pa rin?! Tapos yun pa rin, same long winding issue? They're saddling me with the issue. A friend of mine said, pinoproblema ko daw ang problema ng ibang tao. So true. So, I realized...oo nga naman. I have my own worries. I just want to help lang naman. Kasi when I was younger, being only girl, wala akong masabihan ng heart problems kasi hindi kami ganu'n sa bahay. So I know it's hard, pero yung `yun at `yun din ang problema na sinasabi sa iyo, kunyari hihingi ng payo pero hindi susundin? Nakakagalit talaga.
Ang hirap kasi sa mga kaibigan natin, they confide kasi akala nila maririnig nila ang gusto nilang marinig, hindi `yung DAPAT nilang marinig. When in fact, if you're a true friend, you'll do the latter.
Don't worry, it's not bad to get rid of the toxic...even toxic friends.
P.S. Sorry ang haba ha. Familiar territory kasi ang topic mo eh.
It's okay, Vayie. I needed to vent out a bit. I'm really getting sick and tired of her stories. I forgot to mention that aside from her not following your advice, to add insult to injury, she just makes a cycle out of her situation -- same old, same old.
For sure our friends know what they're supposed to do, but they're just being hard-headed and I'm not sure if they're trying to project the "PITY ME" attitude. I can't deal with her problems anymore. I want to help, but I can't do it if she won't help herself too. Diba?
They love attention so they keep on doing it and despite the fact that they know whatever the people around them are telling them is right, they continue for attention... IT really is sad and it's so hard to deal with these people ... If you leave them naman, they'll say u don't care pero hayayay... She really needs to let her anger out to not invert the feelings and make her hurt herself more... Kelangan talaga super pagalitin siya... I still am glad that you're a good friend, telling her the REALITY and not what she just wants to hear... Psychiatric nurse? hehehe.
Oh. May KSP syndrome pala. "Leaving" would be temporary. It might bring some sense into them so that they'd realize something. I dunno. Sana mauntog na at magbago ang tao na'to. Hindi ko nga nire-replyan sa text e, talagang naiirita ako.
Then at the end she'll realize na tama pala ang advise sa kanya pero huli na ang lahat...ganyan din ang nangyari sa friend ko (I know you just read my CC meme)hingi cya ng hingi ng advice sa akin tapos lalayasan rin lang pala nya ang asawa nya dahil daw walang pera ang asawa nya.Kawawa naman yung lalake kasi panay nga ang over time nya sa trabaho para sa pamilya nya pati ang dalawang anak nya sa pinoy tinanggap ng asawa nya tapos ganun na lang.Sabi ko naman na pwede naman cyang mag trabaho kung kulang ang sweldo ng asawa nya,payag naman ang asawa nya eh,ayaw naman nya..Alam ko naman na nasanay cya bilang dating talent,magaan sa pera pero iba naman pagdating pag nag-asawa ka di ba?Yun ang ayaw nya--gusto nya pera,pera at pera kaya nilayasan nya ang asawa nya..
She's working at the club right now,sabi nya she's happy.Pero naalala ko ang sabi nya sa akin bago cya nag-asawa--sabi nya kung mag-aasawa cya, gusto nya magkakasama-sama sila ng anak nya(sa pinoy)sa Japan. Nagtrabaho uli cya dito,iniwan naman nya uli ang anak nya(pati na ang anak nya sa hapon) dun sa Pinas.Hanggang ngayon hinde ko alam kung talagang tama ang advise ko sa kanya...sabi nya she's happy nga daw...
ps:pasencya na sa pagka haba-habang comment,Russ.Medyo nadala ako..
btw,here are some topics nga pala sa GT:OCTOBER (Girls Fave on Earth!)
1- Bags
8- Perfumes
15- Shoes
22- Dress
29- Accessories
NOVEMBER (FAVE Part 2)
5- fave drinks (alcoholic/non alcoholic)
12- fave chocolate
19- fave pastime
26- fave bday gift ever received
Visit Niko's blog to leave your url pag nakapag post ka na sa topic every Thursday so that other GT participants can visit you too.Here's her site: http://www.nikoganda.com/
Lahat pala tayo, may mga kaibigan na matitigas ang ulo. Nakakainit ng ulo. Hehe.
I'm "saving" Niko's link. I'll most likely have my first post on November 5.Ü Thanks for inviting me Clarissa!
Because people are irrational. They are also very lonely. Surprisingly so.
The desire for companionship, for believing someone cares about (whether in a good or bad way - but just cares, rather than being indifferent) is super strong.
I also think people tend to live precariously on a thin edge between sanity and madness. Getting away from that edge can seem to be very difficult. I think the biggest cause of it is stress. We are constantly pressured and overwhelmed and we don't realize it. Sort of like boiling a lobster - put it in cold water, slowly warm the water and he won't realize he's being cooked. But, eventually, the heat is going to do bad things to his physiology, his biological processes will start to break down. In a similar way, we get overloaded and over stimulated, but we don't notice it and then our minds start to break down and we behave irrationally.
Others will argue that this is normal biological imperative. I believe we are rational beings, not instinctual / reactive beings (but, you sure wouldn't know it from the way people behave).
a good friend of mine once told me that people sometimes just want other people to say what they need to hear. They'll get better eventually, but they always have to go through that "ugly, hurtful" phase in order to get better.
Wow how impolite of her/him!
Just stay cool, maybe the person just want to vent and it happens that you're the person she/he knows that gives nice advices, and you never know, maybe later they could use it.
Next time give your friend a tissue or Talk-To-The-Hand attitude, haha.
K
hmmm... not sure, but maybe your friend had also asked for other ppl's opinions to make a decision?
Thanks for dropping by!
*loves*
amen russ. thank you for speaking the truth.
ganun talaga. may mga masokista kung baga. mahirap ang gnayan, parang addict sa pain!
kg
I understand your feeling Russ.. Some people indeed "like" doing that..That's very annoying..when you try to advise something but they just don't listen at all..So to that kind of person usually I just give 'em my ear to listen..
It's really tiring to deal with these kind of people who only lives in their daydreams and imagination! If you've told her your advice for a couple of times and she still don't listen, I suggest just ignoring her the next time:P
i agree with rico.. thanks for sharing..
NYOG | Not Your Ordinary Guy
Patient Russ...be patient..
well said russ!
as for your friend...possibly blinded by the facts yet. sooner or later it will be revealed, hopefully it will not be a hard fall.
good luck russ
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