Goodbye is Goodbye.
I can't bring myself to be friends with an ex. Please don’t get me wrong. I have tried it and I know that I can be friends with the person but I just prefer not to be. For me, once we part our ways, we part completely. The person has already had that chance, yet it’s just too bad that he screwed up. The line has already been crossed from friendship to lover and now it's lover to pseudo-enemy ex; it's rather difficult to go back to what you first started off as. I can forgive, but I'm not the type who forgets.
It is possible but there's too much that comes along with that new relationship; tons of personal, emotional baggage shared between the two. It can be hard for either side or even both to go from being what you were together to what you are now separately but still have that other person in your life. Hey there are even times when the ugly side you never saw of that person will come out with a vengeance. When I cut ties I cut them for good and want no constant reminder even if it was a great time.
But if you can do it, more power to you. I truly admire you for that. Just because I can't or maybe don't want to, you guys do what will make you happy and happier.
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14 Comments:
That must have felt weird for you dear =X
When I was younger, I thought being friends with an Ex is always okay, but then, looking back, it's better for us, and to our present to really cut the ties. Well, case to case I guess =)
I've tried to be friends with my ex, but well yeah, things are just never be the same again,ever..And sometimes the pain, the anger, and everything we used to have just came right in,and that sucks. So ya, I'd rather say let by gone be by gone.. Better..
Only having had one relationship, I cannot relate. But, it seems a sensible practice. I don't see how you can go from intimacy to non-intimacy and so the break has to be complete. Now, I do know some people who claim to continue to be friends with their exs. But I don't get it.
Personally, I think people get into relationships too quickly before really knowing the other person well. And then hope things will work out. I preferred to get to know the person really well first. But friends always told me that my approach was wrong because a woman wasn't going to wait 6 months or a year while I made up my mind.
Let me first say that I can relate with the photo you posted. Lol.
Anyway... Ako ung type na if you ruined my trust, I'm sorry but you can no longer be trusted. I've done a huge mistake of trying to forgive some people who have ruined my trust over and over again and I must say, it really gets tiring and I just gotta wake up from the reality that it really is hard to trust someone who has broken it once or worse-- a lot of times... Anyway, I'm not only talking about love relationships-- also friendships. I'm sure a lot would agree with this but I know that there are some who are still trying to forgive someone who ruins one's trust again and again thinking he/she's gonna change. It's a never-ending cycle and being kind is not reasonable enough because you tend to forget to be kind to yourself as well. Hwaw. Lol. I'm sure you can relate.
With regards to exes, I agree with you. Though there are some who can still be friends with their exes, I don't think I can especially if the parting of ways had been due to bad reasons. I agree with the part: t can be hard for either side or even both to go from being what you were together to what you are now separately but still have that other person in your life.
Yep. So hard.
being friends is okay but sometimes I can't help but feel concerned...which is not really good because he has his own life now--like I'm just watching him live his life...
I tried to be friends with most of my exes even though most of them were jerks. As time went by I forgot most of them except for my first bf. hehehe
I want/tried to be friends with my exes too. But it was weird because of all the history and baggage. Come to think of it, I'm not friends with my exes too.
*This is actually my third attempt to comment. The first two warrant a blog post of their own. So much kwento.
GEM.
Yeah, it was because I knew that my boyfriend was right behind me ─ just not sure how far he was but I know that he could hear everything that E was saying. E even mentioned M's name.
I just smiled through it, buti na lang I didn't blush and no beads of sweat. Hehe.
OLIVIA.
That makes our lives less complicated and more peaceful.Ü
RICHARD.
I guess it's a case-to-case basis. I'm the type who doesn't just get into a relationship so there is nothing wrong with your approach.
JASSY.
Oh no. I feel that I'm bad because I don't even feel a slight bit of concern for M. It must be a different thing with you. You must have had something really good for you to still be concerned.
CHARLES.
You're way nicer than me for even trying to be friends with them. Your first BF must be very special.
RICO.
Parang it's hard, with the history and stuff, especially you're married.Ö
STEPH.
You really are an Aquarian! I swear, we're alike in sooo many ways. I seem to discover something new thing that we share in every post that either I or you have.
EXes are definitely NON-RECYCLABLE :)
Hey Russ..it's too bad...but i know it will be difficult to re-build a relationship after it has been broken.
Btw, the image is super!! Hahahaa..straight to the head!
Hi! just blog hopping here!
cute blogsite you have here! very informative as well!
hats off to you, not a lot of girls I know can handle break ups like you do. i totally agree - when you part ways, it has to be solid. no excuses. no small talk, no nothing. it worked for me so I can attest to this.
cheers!
JEN.
I super love what you said girl.Ü Quoted you in Tumblr. Hehe.
JAK.
"..i know it will be difficult to re-build a relationship after it has been broken." → This is reality and we gotta live with it. The lives we live after a break up is our choice so we need to make the smarter one.
HUMANBULLSHIT.
"when you part ways, it has to be solid. no excuses. no small talk, no nothing." → This worked for me too. It made me getting on with life easier.Ü Thank you for visiting.
Same here--I have good memories in the past but when the relationship is over,it's over!I don't want to make any ties or whatsoever--what for di ba?I don't even have any pictures of my ex.Do you keep them?Russ,can I ask a question?What if your current bf still keeps his ex-gfs picture,how do you react?Just a question,dear.
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